Monday, April 13, 2009

How little I know

I've been reflecting on how little I understand certain things about men. One of them is when they misbehave in little ways that are almost sure to cause problems. Like, for example, not calling and being very late. I'm late a great deal. Punctuality is not one of my special gifts in this world. So I call ahead. Or try to send email. However, men often seem to not call. Then when asked about it, there is this stupid look. I know they thought of it.

One of my friends is involved in a larger version of this. He's promised to tell people about what happened with a project - and has not. Even when he knows he should. Even when he has been reminded, gently.

It is this kind of thing that I don't understand. What are you guys thinking. Is it that you realize, too late, that you are too late, and that, in itself, makes you delay even more?

I ran into a newbie jerk. He demanded sex, and then when told no, he asked why. He kept pushing and attacking, and I finally lost my temper and told him the truth. His name is Kenji Bohemian, and if you don't fuck him immediately - he calls it "making love" - then he will call you an idiot and stupid and demand to know why.

OK, what goes through a guys head when he does this? Doesn't he realize that piling on the attacks only shoes that he was a liar from the beginning?

Now, for my own misbehavior, I often understand the naughty effect quite well. But this whole doing something that is wrong, and gets nothing - what would it hurt to call? Or apologize? Or something.

How little I still understand. I need to reflect on some things, because they are in my fiction. Writing believable male characters is hard, because it seems that there are so many patterns of behavior that exist, but not in words.

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