Friday, January 11, 2008
Rules for Grrls
You Are The Sex
This is really the heart of it all isn't it? I mean without you, there is no sex happening here? It's like no shoes, no outfit in the real world. That means two things. One is your part, you've got to deliver the sex. From the top of cam, to the bottom of hop on a pose ball, where even "ohhhh baby!" is optional, you have to be the thing that tickles that little urge and gets things going.
On the other hand, it also means that you should never put up with abuse from a client, or more importantly a potential customer. Especially one who is wasting your time to try and just hang out and talk to a girl, without having to do anything.
This means that you have to do the things that say sex. What says sex, in an escort?
The key is your approach, coquettishness mixed with an expression o volcanic desire. The coyness and the desire are both essential. Without the desire, you are a tease, but without the coyness, you are a slut, and he will try and get you to play for free. Now there are some paradoxical ways to show both. The ice princess is attractive if you can pull it off, because he will want to believe he can melt your waters, and produce a spring flood of need. The gushing slut is so consumed by her desire that she ignores all but the most obvious of approaches.
2. You are a professional
Even if you are doing this for your own hobby and fantasy, realize in the end that the man is buying something. What he is buying varies. Some men are buying, or think they are, "skip the date." That is they get off, and for less than the price of coffee and donuts, a chance to impress you with their superior cocksmanship so much that you will want to fall in love with him right there and send your rl phone number. It has happened. Not often.
The other side of this is that you must keep your hands on the keyboard, even if he has his hands on the joystick. It also means you need to know sl, and know how to produce the effects needed.
3. You are stroking his ego.
OK. Why you, and not a cheap porn DVD rental, or glossy airbrushed magazine? Because you are there for him. Him, and not someone else. That means that you know something about him already: it is about him, he'd rather see a simulation of sex where he is involved, than real sex where someone else. Now, personally I think this is... great! Watching other people fulfilling their desires is nowhere near as much fun as being involved and entangled.
So this means that the real focus of this is his own inner sense of himself, and feeling good. It's his money (see you are a professional) and it is a connection to your sensuality that makes him want this (see you are the sex). To reach this means finding out what it is in his identity needs feeding. For some it is really simple: a guy wearing a super oversized cock wants to hear how big it is, how hard it is, how it is splitting you open, and basically taking your virginity all over again and making you forget about every other man, stretching you out so that no other man can satisfy. I don't share this view of men who are much larger than was intended to fit inside me, but that's their thing.
Other men are a step removed, but not that much harder. For example the guy who is eager eager eager to "lick your pussy." His ego is that you are supposed to realize that he has made concessions to your desire snd loves your smell and taste. Nothing wrong with this, but generally the guys who are gooshy eager to do this... ummm aren't very good at it. Generally they want to stick the tongue straight into the vagina with no real foreplay, or have a very vauge understanding of how tongue and clitoris dance best with each other. But unless asked, you aren't there to help him change these deficiencies in his lovemaking style, but to flatter his killer lover style.
The other division between clients is one of the most important in your life, and I've alluded to it above. That division is the division between men who are about their own feelings, and men who get their ego gratification from yours. The second will cause you no end of trouble. The nicest thing they can be is a pest. Believing that since they got off, naturally you are all wet to keep getting them off, rl, free, forever more. Maybe with their girlfriend in the mix. mmmhmmm.
You would much rather have clients who think of nothing but their own pleasure, even if it means doing some icky things virtually, because they aren't any trouble, they come, the get off, they go to bed happy.
The crucial moment in almost any client relationship comes, and it always does, when they move from being about themselves to being about you. This moment can be handled well or badly. The key thing to realize is that you don't want to keep them as a client, but you may want to keep them as a friend. A client who wants you to fall in love with him is bad, a client who wants to hurt you to feel better is bad. However, a former client who has grown to respect you as a human being, become a friend, turned desire to have you into setting you as a shining example of grace and beauty, is often worth more than any client.
4. Hold on to yourself.
This is a big big big big rule. It is one that is almost never properly expressed, except in a kind of cynical detachment.
There is a better way to look at it. You bring pleasure to people who are otherwise lonely, unhappy, confused or at least just plain horny and in no position to do much about it. You are one of the pillars of the second life economy. You should, also, being headed for more than escorting. This doesn't mean bug things, but personal things. If you are working thorugh or just partaking in a fantasy, and you've been driven far enough to come here, then there is a reason for it.
Holding on to yourself means remembering why you are here, and why you are doing this. Most importantly, remembering your own unique value as a person, within yourself. Something that cannot be taken away by some jerk with a need to hurt women to feel good.