It's not the exclusivity...
or even in the end, the monotony.
The truth is, marriage is not about fidelity,
but in the end ... nonogamy!
Let's face it you're a chump,
once a month is worse than many monks!
The difficulties pile up!
And when you get it it's abrupt,
or perhaps the kids will interupt!
So don't play games with an old roleplay
that's come and gone and had it's day,
Really marriage is a bore,
a kid of socially imposed chore,
we don't need it any more,
when laid out before you...
is a smorgasbord.
Have a long one, then a short one,
try them out in thin or wide,
swirl around and feel them inside,
you never know if you've gone wrong,
until you've tried all the options on.
Maybe you like them thin,
Maybe you like them strong.
What matters if they can get it in,
And know how to keep it long…
Why should you beg?
When there are all these prospects,
It's a shame to waste a night,
When they don't even put up a fight!
So don't be Victorian,
Or a study for a historian,
Pierce your ears, or pierce your nose,
Put bling on your fingers and on your toes,
Pierce your nipples, I confess
You aren't really daring unless
You've pierced your… well take a guess.
It's all the same in here,
What do you have to fear?
Shed the pounds and shed the years…
No reason for the trauma and the tears!
No reason to be a malcontent
Or fill your dreams with deep portents,
Keep it shallow
Keep it clean
And sometimes mean.
Try the orgies,
or group sex,
be a witch and cast a hex,
try the other gender out,
have a tail, or have a snout.
Why not a darker experiment,
you'll be so happy,
you'll forget, where all the hours, got up and went.
It's not unreal,
It's what you feel,
And listen, here is the deal,
What's the competition really then?
A lost and fizzled old passion.
So you can hold me in infamy,
while I'll writhe in ecstasy
I've no time, for nonogamy.