Thursday, April 24, 2008

A short letter to men

Dear Men,

You have between your legs a marvelous instrument which is the channel of life. It is capable of delivering great pleasure, and capable of being a connection between two people in hedonism, affection, and even love. However, many of you swing it around, metaphorically, virutally, and actually, in a clumsy and offensive way. You are often abusive to women in order to pound us down. People like John Grohol are professional bullies, and dozens and dozens of men have passed through my second life existence thinking that any woman who is not their cum bucket is a crazy bitch.

Can't you see how self-destructive this is? Maybe society accepts it, and I can see that it clearly does, because many of the most abusive of men are coddled, praised, and protected. But it leads to unhappiness. The more it is allowed and tolerated in society, the more unhappy the men and women in it are.

One problem is that many of you act as if your selves are extensions of your cock. This is almost a sure way of making yourself odious to all but a few women who are desperate. Perhaps you think you want that, the desperate woman who will abase herself for your cock, real or otherwise, but really, it is not a good idea, and it leads to things like ... divorce. I had one male friend tell me the joke that "Divorce is the screwing you get for the screwing you got."

I'd like you to think about it a different way. Instead of thinking that your cock is the attractive thing, reverse this. Your cock is a conduit for your essence, in rl, biologically, but in virtual worlds, metaphorically. A relationship with another person makes your cock attractive, because it becomes that symbolic key, that link, between what makes you special as an individual, and as a man. The more that manliness is attractive, the more that inner essence is attractive, the more the thing from which it's spark jumps is attractive.

This means that the size of your cock is a great deal less important than the shape of your character, and the content of your mind. This means that the first orifice that you should try and enter, is the ear. People who might well have convinced me to do things with them, often don't, because they don't want to persuade me, they just want to pound my face down to their cock. Whether people like John Grohol, or others too numerous to mention.

Just a thought. Your mileage may vary, as the expression goes.

But it probably won't vary by much.


  1. omg amen! amen! Too true! You've said quite eloquently what has been bouncing through my head for a while.

  2. I'm not making friends with this comment, but from my experience the majority of men are jerks or act jerky most of the time. And SL seems to especially attract the jerky acting men, who mistake SL for a first person shooter (or rather, a first person masturbator).

    Did you know that the older avatars get, the less men there are? The majority of my gender-colleagues simply never grasped the idea that this is a SOCIAL place, and that what counts here is not your pysical equipment, but only your social interaction, your personality or, as I prefer to call it, your soul!

    I met a lot of beautiful souls in SL, and I hope some of the people that crossed my path saw my soul as enrichment of their second existance too.

    On a few occasions this has led to intimacy (and each of those was a wonderful celebration of unity), on most occasions it has not. So what? Who thinks SL is about getting laid made his first - and in the long run fatal - mistake.

  3. Forgot to switch email notifications on... dummy me

  4. I think instead it is that the jerks are very visible, because, like the people who reap the newbies for money, they have to be in everyone's faces.

    Where as the more poetic souls are a bit shy, and the men who are really worth while are often busy doing worthwhile things....